Days 27-29: Delaying Gratification

After reaching 10 pounds lost (and never to be found again!), I realized I never have determined any goals for myself rather than the general "get fit, eat well, look hotter" blah, blah. I know a lot of weight-loss bloggers pick a cool gift or something fun when they reach each milestone. I thought that would work pretty well for me. Gigglepuss loves presents anytime!!!

So, I decided to shop around online and get some ideas of things that I want. I want a new digital camera, I need a new swimsuit, I really, really want to buy a heartrate monitor, I would love to go on vacation, I always need a new book to read....but I need to save for the wedding! But, if I space my goals out, I can afford some fun splurges down the road, right? Well, I just shouldn't be trusted with a credit card, just like I shouldn't be trusted with strawberry cheesecake. (Go ahead and put 10 tons of chocolate in front of me and I won't touch it, but I loves me some cheesecake!)

Here is a list of what I ended up purchasing since Thursday:

1. Two pairs of workout pants from Old Navy (I still hate you for switching to online buying only for my size but I can't ignore your prices!) on sale
2. Two pairs of flipflops (Old Navy sale yet again!)
3. Two workout video sets from Jillian Michaels
4. Two books (Half-Assed and Where Did All the Fat Go?)
5. New swimsuit from Old Navy that I plan on wearing to aqua aerobics (mine is two years old and getting very thin in certain spots)
6. Three tops and two pairs of capris from Lane Bryant for $60 total (gotta love coupons!)

I rarely go shopping crazy, but sometimes I just can't help myself. I think that could be part or my weight issues too. I usually do pretty well and eat on plan, but when I get around some things I haven't had in awhile (pizza, the previously mentioned cheesecake), I just have to have some. I need to figure out how to control myself! The food will still be available later...you can plan to have it and still stay in calorie-range. Just don't go chowing down when you've already had your scheduled meal. And just because there is a lot left over, you don't have to finish it all up now. What is going to be the best for you...enjoying the food for the moment in your mouth or later when you beat yourself up about it? I can think of these ways to combat it now but where is my brain when the temptation is actually there? Blech, I hate thinking too deeply!

So, maybe I'll save some of these things that I bought for a reward down the road. I don't know if I'll be able to control myself knowing that they are right there and available in the closet, though!

Days 24-26: Backed Up

Yay, I have a chance to post today! Giggleman's hours at work changed this week, so he has been home more in the morning. I get to see him more, which is great, but I don't get my time in on here. I'll deal :)

I'm still working hard with eating well...I'm still having issues with some sabotaging thoughts like "Why can't I eat this?" or "It's not fair!" or "I can do whatever I want" or "Just one won't hurt me". Time to reread that day in the Beck book. Yep, I'm still reading it, even though I think some of her ideas are crap. You know what is unfair? The way men can lose weight faster than women sucks! Giggleman weighed in at the gym this week...he's lost about 30 more pounds since March, and he has only cut back a bit on his food intake. WTF? I know my weight loss is going to be a LOT slower due to the conditions I fight (it'd help if I would stop typing and call the doc to renew my thyroid and PCOS scripts while I'm complaining). I also need to be vigilant on saying NO and working on doing my own cooking when the man doesn't. The kitchen is a mess at the moment and I don't want to clean it so I keep out! But then, I make other bad food choices to compensate. Sometimes I wish I could be blissfully ignorant about calorie counts, but that is what got me here, so I have to frighten myself with totals when I don't plan ahead.

Now time to move on to a sensitive subject...bowel movements. I was diagnosed with IBS back in middle school when I thought I'd die on the toilet. X-rays showed I was completely backed up...ewwww...and I given a list of foods to eat and added fiber supplements. Well, my parents did not change our foods at home, but I did drink down the gritty gross drinks full of fiber for awhile. I haven't really had any problems since then...until starting South Beach! In week 2, I noticed I hadn't done the deed for days. When I did finally go, it was a bit painful. I changed my settings on SparkPeople to check out what I was getting for fiber. OH SHIT! Yeah, I must have skimmed the part about how Phase 1 can cause some constipation due to the lack of grains and fruits and the off-limit veggies. Now that I'm putting some back in the diet, I'm just about back to normal, but I may need to add a supplement in again (I know the fiber supplement options are sooooo much better now than when I suffered as a kid). I certainly don't need poo up to my eyeballs inside me!!!

Day 20-23: Becoming a Gym Bunny

I didn't get to post yesterday because I was too busy at the gym before work. That's right, we finally rejoined the gym as of last Friday. So, I spent a good bit of time on the treadmill, in the weight room, and the pool. It is terribly sad to see how much my speed has dropped since we had to quit before. The first day, I wanted to quit at 30 minutes going between 3-3.5 mph. I persevered and went another 20 minutes. I was up to 9-10 minute miles last year. But, I will regain my power if I keep going! Luckily, my strength hasn't decreased much...and my legs are very strong! I really do need to work on my upper body strength, which is what I'll focus on this week.

Time for my weekly weigh-in results! I weighed myself at the gym and was shocked at the low number. Sunday night, my Aunt Flo decided to restart again (how dare you keep visiting more than once a month without proper notice!!!) so I am up a couple pounds from Sunday, which still puts me at 302. So, 10 pounds down this month! Yeehaw!

And forget what I said about me needing my carbs so much!!! I figured out that was my TOM cravings that were deluding my thoughts. I did indulge in Ritz Bits with Peanut Butter on Saturday...extremely high carb day! But, I am feeling more fulfilled with my peanut butter and banana wrap for breakfast than with just eggs and canadian bacon or veggie patties or whatever else I was doing for the first two weeks.

Day 20-23 Totals:

• Calories: 1099/1439/992/1057
• Fat: 49/79/43/32
• Carbs: 121/175/62/77
• Protein: 45/38/101/127
  

Day 19: We're #2!!

If you've read my previous posts, you can tell I am a fan of The Biggest Loser. While reading another person's blog (I forget whose, sorry!), I found out that the Australian episodes are available on YouTube. Score! So, I sometimes watch an episode or two after work. I noticed right away that a few gals there were bigger, maybe a bit heavier than me. In the American version, the gals are usually smaller, with the exception of Isabeau and Amber in season 4 who both weighed 290ish. Season 5 Kelly weighed around 270 I think at the beginning. Now I know there are heavier gals out and about, maybe just not pleasing to American viewers so they aren't seen, except for those headless fatty videos on the news. But based on the sizes I saw on the Australian episode, I wasn't surprised to read the article stating that Australia is now the World's Fattest Nation! The US was beat by a whole 1%....only 25% of us are obese. Interesting, no?

I have decided to head on to Phase 2 of the SBD. I'm really missing fruit and I would like to go back to a bit of breakfast or lunch grains. My brain seemed to function better on the days that my carbs went high earlier in the day. I will NOT be eating high GI/carbs at dinner or later in the evening though. The pizza night and one of the other off-plan days taught me that I feel like shit the morning after and cannot drag myself out of bed. Overall, I think the South Beach Diet has been a good thing for me to try. I've learned so much about how my body reacts to food. When I eat well, I just feel better about myself. And I'm glad I decided to track my food intake, even though counting calories isn't really required for the plan. I'm also finding it easy to track my food...I always thought it was a pain in the ass before. I don't know why! With keeping everything updated on SparkPeople, I can go back and review what works best and what days I felt better. Now, all I need is a cheer squad to keep me going :)

Day 19 Totals:

• Calories: 1753
• Carbs: 149 (yep, I had a sub and a cookie because I would have felt bad by saying no to the person who gave it)
• Fats: 78
• Protein: 120
  

Day 18: Loser Envy!!

My scale at home has some serious issues!! Actually, I believe it has The Biggest Loser scale envy. You know what I'm talking about. On the show, the scale goes up and down before finally settling on the weight to create suspense. My scale tries the same technique even after changing batteries! The first time I step on, it gives me a low number...not extremely low, but I just don't trust it!! I jump on a second time and it gives me a huge number! My scale finally commits to a number after the third try. Today, all my weights were lower than my last weigh-in, so that's a good thing!!

Yesterday, I had a great food day until after work. Giggleman was supposed to cook white bean turkey chili when he got home. He emailed me at work and asked if he could order out instead. Grrrrrr!! So, I come home to pizza, of course! "But, I ordered you whole wheat crust!! That's healthy!!" Ummmm, yes it is, but I'm trying to stay off bread this last week. Man mentality. I was hungry, and planned on eating 2 slices, tops. I still am lacking in self-control...I had another piece because it was just sitting there prodding me to take more. But, I stopped after that piece even though there was still a lot more pizza left. Baby steps...

Day 18 Totals:

• Calories: 1876
• Carbs: 217 (sigh!)
• Fat: 89
• Protein: 84